I Did it Myself

High school was like being at the bottom of a deep, dark well. I had awful grades, no self-esteem, money troubles, and family troubles.

People tried, but there was nothing anyone could do to change my view of my world or myself. It was grim at best, and the truth is, I'm lucky I'm still in the world at all.

I had quite a few supportive teachers, but there was one special high school teacher who, without even knowing, helped me change my life.

Mrs. Pasquine, my Media and Society teacher, pointed out to me that my interests in the way that our forms of medias (TV, films, books, newspapers, and magazines - like very one you're reading) impact on people, didn't simply have to be an interest. I could actually pursue a future in it. Suddenly, I felt like there was a little more hope for me.

Instead of reaching into the dark well to try and pull me out, like so many other people who cared about me had, Mrs. Pasquine showed me how to get myself out.

This newfound desire to learn caused me to look at my other classes differently. It was late in my high school career, but I promised myself that I was actually going to show up to class, try hard while I was there, and study when I was home. My determination paid off, the very last semester of high school I got all A's on my report card.

Mrs. Pasquine often told stories about her alma mater. Dorm life actually sounded kind of cool for once. College classes, she explained, were very different from high school classes. Your major course of study allowed you to focus on your favorite subjects. Your minor concentration allowed you to spend time on other things you liked. It sounded like it was a way to get to know more about my world and myself - I was hooked.

I decided that I should go to FSC. I did apply to other schools, and even got accepted, but after the entire college search ordeal, I still chose FSC.

I realized quickly college is truly full of opportunities. There were brilliant speakers who came to campus. There are fun programs, wonderful clubs and organizations, and so many great peers who are smart and lots of fun. I learned that most people are much more laid back socially in college than in high school. At FSC there's almost no noticeable "cliques." Groups of friends hang out, sure, but they're so diverse. It's perfectly normal to go from one group to another throughout the day. I began to thrive in this atmosphere.

One day in my Introduction to Sociology class, a girl sat in the seat next to me. She spoke first and told me her name was Sarah and that she remembered me from orientation, (a program you go through to get to know the college before the school term starts). She told me she liked what I had to say and thought I seemed smart and interesting. I couldn't imagine someone sitting next to me in a high school class and saying these wonderful things. We eventually became roommates.

I'll sum dorm life up for you quickly - unless you come across some very unique living situation in your future, a college dorm is your chance to live in a building with a ton of friends and have a lot of fun. Having a roommate will change your life, even if it's not the best one in the world. Thankfully, I happened to have the best one in the world.

When it came time to choose my major, the communication major made the most sense. I'm so pleased with my choice, and I got to minor in sociology, too. I've also taken many other classes just for the fun of it. Of course, there's required types of classes you have to fill (like math, which I don't love), but you still end up learning. You might even be surprised by how well you do and how much you like it. Or you'll at least feel like you accomplished something.

Outside of class, I tried out a lot of clubs. There were a few I didn't particularly like, and some that I just didn't have time for. Others gave me a way to develop leadership skills, be an activist, and make friends.

Even though I had money troubles, increased success helped me earn scholarships. Family troubles still linger. Unfortunately, those problems have a tendency to stick around. I had to learn that I could only change things about myself, not things about the people around me. It's part of the growing that we all have to do. It hurts, but I've been determined not to let it ruin all of the wonderful things I've been able to achieve.

And that's the most important thing about college - I did it all for myself, not to impress other people or show other people that I could do it. Things were hard and I had a lot of hurdles to get over, but I found ways to make it happen. Even if you might not have the best start, college can help you turn things around and give you a better start into the rest of your life.

JoAnn C.
Framingham, Massachusetts

Reprinted from Positive Teens Magazine Volume 6 Issue 2, Mar/Apr 2004

{ Back to Commentary }